We've known each other for a while now. We've shared some of the most brutal hikes and extreme cold weather together. We've bonded over terrible dinners— hell, I couldn't even tell where the Puritan Irish stew began and the dog food ended! ... But what's going on? Why did you give me the cold shoulder at Waskwei River? I was looking forward to having you over in my tent, while your lazy owner went to sleep early in his hammock. Instead, you just whined and moaned until running back to him. He must really have you on a leash.
I hope we're still friends. But if you have a problem with me, just say something man.